100 Words / Prompt: Frightened

There’s only been a few times in my life when I’ve been truly whites-of-my-eyes frightened: once when stranded late at night on the London Underground, once when driving during a dangerous ice storm.  Once flying through bad turbulence while watching smoke from raging wildfires darken the sky.

But it’s when I look at my achingly beautiful, emotionally fragile daughter, knowing that someday I will no longer be able to watch over her and keep her safe – that’s when I experience an acidic, gnawing fear, edging on panic, made all the harder because I cannot let it show.  It lingers, hidden.

~ by arcticwren on February 25, 2011.

7 Responses to “100 Words / Prompt: Frightened”

  1. Indeed, fear is part of motherhood, of parenthood. But there’s a special fear reserved for when your children are getting ready to leave the nest and fly on their own, especially when one of them can be termed “vulnerable”. Not clinically, no, but fragile. You know there is a lot of hurt in the world, and you know she’ll make it through, like we all did… but still, it’s very hard to bear. I talked to my mother and she admitted she also felt that way about me. That’s something I had never considered before, and it somehow made things a little bit better.

  2. Oh yes, mothers know this well. When my first child was only a few weeks old I was carrying him down the stairs and out of nowhere ambushed with an image of my falling down the stairs with him in my arms. Terror gripped me and I sat down on a stair midway down and stayed there for several minutes unable to move. I was afraid my husband would come home and find me like that.

  3. Thank you for your comments!

  4. You captured my biggest fear. I want to be able to protect them forever… That fear will be never ending… Great writing!

  5. Only a parent can know that emotion. I cried when my daughter married and moved only across town, so I’m pretty emotional. Imagine the state of hubby and I when we moved our son 4 or 5 hours north of here…could barely speak to each other on the looooong drive home. Good job!

  6. oh – so very true – your words catch every mama’s heart. Thank you for sharing them.

  7. You took me deep into a mother’s heart with your beautiful, flowing words. I look forward to having children of my own someday and experiencing this kind of love from the other end. I’ve been very blessed to have had a wonderful example in my own mom.

    Thanks for dropping by my blog! 🙂

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